It's a cheap act of self promotion!

Show Name: I Love Criticulous and Criticulous Loves Me
Artist: Gareth K Vile
Venue: Arches LIVE 2012
Date: Sat 29 Sep 2012 |2pm onwards | Foyer| Free

Descriptions (from The Arches Website): He took confession, investigated murder, chatted to stars and was locked up in a basement for his art. Now Criticulous faces the ultimate challenge: collaboration. 

Unwilling to admit that criticism is not the original art form, Criticulous fights his ego and mounting anxiety to present a series of pieces that brings dance, radio, dialectics, sculpture and the audience into his relentless quest to understand a world he did not create but reflects.
Contains desperation.


The rumour is that Vile is trying to retire me. He did that thing in the Fringe - The Passion of Criticulous -  and it got me into a fist-fight with a Polish political company. I don't think it is an accident that he keeps making works that involve me either insulting people who are bigger than me, or being put into clear and present danger. The last time I went, I was performing in a lift-shaft. Health and Safety?

Oh, I am sorry. Please, allow me to introduce myself. My name is Mr Criticulous. I am the world's only performance critic. That is to say, no-one else would be stupid enough to do something like this. I have been working with The Vile Arts for about three years. I represent the attempt by Vile to break the fourth wall, from the audience's side.

This particular production - I Love Criticulous, and Criticulous Loves Me - is supposed to be the last part of the Criticulous Trilogy. It is the final Criticulous performance, in much the same way as Status Quo did a farewell tour in 1986. Get real. I'm The Vile Arts' cash cow.

You'll notice the intelligent reference to Joseph Beuys in the title. Originally, we intended to recreate the classic Live Art work, in which Beuys spent some time in a gallery space with a coyote. Sadly, we clash with Alien War in the basement, which does something similar to far more visceral effect.

You can insert the jokes here about how no self-respecting scavenger would want to share a room with a critic.

I'd like to take this opportunity to invite you  to come along and find out what we've decided to do instead. I'll be blogging on and off all day, giving you little extracts of the show, reflecting on the process, making slurs and revealing showbiz secrets.