Sepp Blater's Bribery Fringe Sweepstake

Since it is pretty likely that I am going to need a new job soon, and Gareth is getting tired of not earning any money for all his blogging, it's Sepp Blatter here with the All New Fringe Reviews.

Here's the deal people: I think we'll be seeing aliens in the Fringe before long. So if you want to keep your press releases being churned out, make with the readies. I'll be giving your press releases the quickest glance and awarding a rating - everyone of those lovely footballs is worth tickets to your shows, so don't be miserly. I've got an anti-racism campaign to run, even though I think there isn't any racism in football, anyway.


FIFA stands for discipline, respect, fair-play, not just on the field of play, but in our society as well. So I am delighted at my first preview.

SCOTT CAPURRO
ISLAMOHOMOPHOBIA: RELOADED1-24 August (not 11th)
The Assembly Rooms
Studio 1
10pm (duration 1 hour) £9/£10 Preview: 30 July £8/£9

Scott Capurro returns to the Edinburgh Fringe Festival to perform his most recent show, and perhaps his most personal.

Islamohomophobia: Reloaded takes the audience on a bumpy, hilarious and poignant comic journey, as Scott reflects on the death of his mother, while meandering through the sloppy, romantic meeting and marriage to his Brazilian concubine, Edson. Not everyone, including Scott’s Dad, is enthusiastic about the couple’s happiness, with veiled homophobia rearing its stale comb-over in various guises; including, but not limited to, US Immigration and a young Muslim guy bent on queer bashing.
His cause: to make people, and critics, realize that ignoring Islam is not only racist, but also a waste of some pretty fabulous punchlines.

Since 2004, I have been behind the campaign to make women's football more popular. I suggested "Let's get women to play in different and more feminine garb than the men, in tighter shorts." So it is great to see that women are allowed at the Fringe.

Play Solo (USA)
Running Into MeWritten and performed by Vickie Tanner
Directed by Bruce McCarty (and Padraic Lillas)

A compelling story of one woman’s remarkable struggle to break free from a misguided upbringing on the streets of LA. A phone call from home sends Vickie Tanner on a whirlwind tour of her life; from the drug and prison culture of her youth in Compton, Los Angeles, where most of the men around her served time and her family ridiculed her for choosing education, to the determined pursuit of a more fulfilling life as an actor in New York City. Ultimately this riveting journey of both tragedy and triumph leads her back to where she came from. You can run away, but wherever you go there you are…

Underbelly Cowgate, 56 Cowgate, Edinburgh EH1 1EG
31 July to 24 August (Not 11 August)
Time: 13:20 – 14:20 (60 minutes)

Finally for today, a country close to my heart. Everyone saw me checking out that model's rack and getting on the good foot at the start of the world cup, so here's a show from the home of football. For the next month, anyway.

BRAZOUKA – the world premiere of a big scale Brazilian dance-drama, directed by Arlene Philips and written and co-created by Pamela Stephenson Connolly; introducing lambazouk and other authentic Afro-Brazilian dances, and telling the true story of Braz dos Santos and his journey from the streets of Brazil to dancing on the world stage. [Playing at Main Hall, Assembly Mound @5.30pm from 31 July – 26 August. Reviewers invited in from 2 August.]

So, artists of the Fringe! Get out those brown paper envelopes or, if you are a lady, put on a tight gold dress and don't slap me for staring at you shamelessly at an awards' ceremony!