Meet the Vile Top Five

Finally, I am going to leave my cell and see some shows. In half an hour, I shall be out, and you might be able to catch me in person at some of the following shows. For the price of a coffee, I shall pick a show that you are guaranteed to enjoy - if not, you can write a comment at the bottom of this blog. For a meal, I'll timetable the rest of the festival for you. 

So - look out for the beard, the melancholic smile and the lively laughter of a man who has been cooped up in a recording studio for the best part of two weeks...

Before he finishes, I want to see Dusty Limits. He is hosting the Bongo Club, and his show Post-Mortem ends tomorrow. It's free, he's one of the true neo-cabaret greats, and his show is at the Counting House Ballroom. Rather than sing his praises  - I have to be out in ten minutes and thinking this stuff up is hard work - I'll let him do it for himself.

"The show incorporates a songs from each of Dusty's previous solo shows, plus some brand new offerings, strung together by implausible reminiscences and barbed observations. No gimmicks, no tricks. Just a body, a voice, and a slightly-addled mind."

Counting House, until 19 August

After that, it's Dance Base for Wendy Houston. I am going for the solo shows today... here's a legend of the Performance Art scene (a tag I am sure does not justice to her range) in a rare Fringe appearance. Again, it finishes tomorrow, and has a good crack against ageism. It is boosted by Donald Hutera, one of my favourite writers on dance and the whole awkward squad of artists I so adore.

Dance Base, until 19 August

Jonny Woo claims that partying with him can seriously improve your social life. I have a story about a Fringe a  few years ago that has nothing to do with Woo but involves an angry bar owner, a male burlesque act and a late night chase that explains why I am up for Wonder Woo-Man. He has apparently shaved his beard since the show started, and now looks more like Mary Portas (I mistook him for her when he arrived for a radio interview, even though I don't know who she is). 

Woo's way with drag has much in common with comedy and the edgier work I love: cabaret may be the bucket for work that fits neither theatre not dance nor music nor stand up, but it has given a space for the maverick Tranny Superstar to reach out his love to the Fringe.

Assembly, 1 -26 August

I accept that The Shit needs to be thrown: it's Italian, it is angry, it is late night at Summerhall. A monologue that is howled and screamed, it rejects musicality for sheer expression of rage, a bellow of disgust at the devouring of the body by forces human and beyond. How can I miss it?

Summerhall, 7 -26 August

And my last choice - my chance meeting with a reader of this blog, who feels sufficiently inspired by my words to offer me a drink. I'll stick to the coffee, but will reveal some of the backstage anecdotes that even Criticulous won't share...