Don't Vote. It only encourages them.

I think I had better swear off politics right now, or I am going to be spending the next few months explaining why, despite my belief in the necessity of environmentally conscious policies, Patrick Harvey's egotism puts me right off The Green Party (short version, he can't keep his coupon off any literature). So here are my resolutions for the upcoming elections.

I accept that all politicians are idiots and liars. 
And I do mean all of them. I can't prove it, but it is, as Dr Fox said, they have got more DNA in common with crabs than humans. Voting for any of them is the lesser of multiple evils - remember Nick Clegg and his support for students? I refuse to be seduced by old men with beards, or clean shaven thrusting leaders, or humble yet thoughtful women. I have been doing criticism long enough to know its another act.

Tommy Sheridan - where do I begin?
Frankly, voting for Tommy is to ignore his misogyny. No, wait: stop your internal debate. He abused women in court just because they slept with him. However, Tommy made this video: it is the funniest thing I have seen this week. The way he talks to the prospective voter reveals that he knows what I know: only a fucking idiot would vote for him.